My Mom, The Hero

This post deals with Organ donation. Not many details are mentioned, but some of our experiences over the time of my Mom's death are discussed. Nothing graphic, but if you prefer not to read this type of stuff, feel free to pass.


Mom had had 3 surgeries in her life, and had been in the hospital many times. At her last Cardiologist appointment she found out she would be needing a pace maker in the very near future. She had basically said that she wasn't going to get one, since she was tired of surgeries, and said she'd rather go Home with Jesus than be in the hospital one more time.

So, on the day Mom passed away and we were reminded that she was an organ donor, my heart and soul started a battle. I knew she wanted to help others, but I also knew this meant another operation table for her.

I knew she wasn't there. In my mind I was picturing her dancing with Jesus, and giving Grandma Rosina a big hug. Yet, with my human eyes, I saw her earthly body laying there. The body that hugged me, picked me up as a stumbling toddler, snuggled with me on cold winter nights, ...I saw my Mom.

It took everything I had in me not to take the Organ Donation Representative by the hand, show her the door, and tell her to forget the whole thing.

Later that night, when family and friends had left the house, we got a call from Life Net (an organ donation organization) requesting our permission to use certain organs. 

They went through a whole list, and we had to simply say "Yes", or "No". As my family sat in our living room trying to decide with each question what Mom would have wanted, I wanted to pull the phone cord out of the wall!

I wanted to end the conversation.

I wanted to answer "NO" to each question.

Please don't touch my Mom!


For weeks now I've been dealing with this. Anytime I would think about what has happened, my mind would go back to the evening we sat in the living room on the phone with Life Net. I would think about Mom's body going through another operation.....one that would do the opposite of most.

I've had a bitterness about me when it comes to this. My mind has been on Mom being 'hurt' another time.

Today after work I headed to Martin's to pick up a cake for my Pap's birthday party. Just as I walked into the bakery section my phone rang. It was dad, and he said he wanted to read something he had received in the mail.

He read the following from Old Dominion Eye Foundation:


Dear Mr. Skidmore,

I would like to take this opportunity to extend my sincere appreciation for your assistance with the eye donation of Mrs. Karen Skidmore. The Old Dominion Eye Foundation is truly thankful for your thoughtfulness and concern for others at the time of your wife's death.

Take comfort in knowing that both donated corneas were transplanted. Two people are now able to see a sunset, a mountain range, or a loved one's smile because of this difficult decision your family made. One cornea went to a recipient in Beaverdam, VA and the other cornea went to a recipient in Alexandria, VA. I hope this knowledge will help ease the pain caused by the loss of your loved one during this difficult time of adjustment and sadness.

Thank you for helping to give the gift of sight and for providing hope to the thousands of individuals who still await this precious gift. Please accept the enclosed booklet 'Life Beyond Loss' as a small token of our appreciation and sympathy for your family.

Sincerely yours,
Tracey Davilla
Donor Center Coordinator

So there I stood in Martin's Bakery crying my heart out. I'm sure the bakery lady thought I was crazy when I asked through tears, snot dripping of the end of my nose, and a bubbly voice, "Can you write 'Happy Birthday Pap' on this for me?"

Some other Mother can now see her daughter. Maybe a daughter can now see her Mom. How selfish I have been.

Someone can see the Sunshine now, one of Mom's favorite things!

Mom wanted this. As my brother-in-law has said several times, "Mumz would have thought it silly NOT to donate her organs to help some one." Just because thats the kind of person she was. She is celebrating in heaven because her gift has helped someone SEE!

Not to sound cliche, but my eyes have been opened to Organ Donation. I can't say that I've come to terms with it yet, but I think I might be one step closer.

I just keep thinking, My Mom: The Hero!